Going Commando in the Classroom

Now that I am devoted to taking my exercise classes I frequently find myself in the position of having to shower at the gym. First let us be clear on one thing: I despise showering at the gym. I will drive completely out of my way to go home and shower rather than showering at the gym. I am one of those freaks you see squishing into the stall in shower shoes clutching a bag the size of which is suitable for 2 weeks of European travel. I then plaster the sides of the just-a-little-too-narrow curtain to each end of the stall and try to disrobe while not letting anything touch that floor. Imagine if will a space not larger than 3 feet across and 2 feet deep, a gigantic gym bag containing every known toiletry item (in miniature, of course), a woman attempting to peel off spandex which is glued to her body with sweat while not touching the floor, the walls, the too-narrow-curtain, or fall over, and you have a pretty good image of me showering at the gym.

So it is probably no surprise that in this process, sometimes things go astray. I was sure I had put fresh underpants in my bag. Positive they were in there. I undressed. I showered. I stood, shivering, trying not to let any part of my body touch anything and I desperately searched through that bag. I went through it several times. I took everything out and juggled it with one arm while searching with the other. No underpants.

Now it's decision time: do I attempt to pull the old-sweaty-rolled-into-a-tight-elastic-ball underpants back on??? do I go without? What will my mother say if she finds out I've been running around town without my underpants on??? I'm sure I'll get a lecture about rashes and urinary tract infections at the very least. I looked at those sweaty underpants for along time, but alas, I couldn't do it. I chose commando. Unfortunately I was showering at the gym because I had to be at recess duty at my daughter's school so that meant performing a volunteer job at an elementary school without any underpants. I feel confident that violates some child protection and safety rules somewhere.

And just in case you're wondering what type of pants I was wearing whilst going...bare...they were loose fitting cotton yoga pants, not jeans or (God forbid) more spandex. So there Mom, I was wearing cotton, which as I've been told many many times breathes! Well, I don't know about the breathing part, but as it was a very windy day, I can certainly attest to the air flow...