And the Winner is....Ellen DeGeneres! (Sorry Dr. Oz and Oprah)

Congratulations Ellen!  By unanimous vote Ellen has won her place on our family's TiVo as a Season's Pass program.  This is quite an honor as Ellen had to beat Dr. Oz and Oprah to get the TiVo space.  Even my husband, who doesn't like anyone, can't help but laugh at Ellen's antics (though in his heart of hearts I know he really wanted Jerry Springer).

Ellen makes me laugh and laughter is good for the mind, body, and soul.  I usually fast forward through the crowd cheering (because they do tend to go on a bit long) and start right at her stand-up bit.  Ellen doing stand-up comedy is perhaps my favorite part of the show.  I then fast forward through her dancing (I would watch if Ellen was really going to get down but she is limited by the stairs so all her dances kind of look the same) and start up again as soon as she plays her first game or has her first guest.  Ellen keeps her show moving: guests, games, silliness, more guests, more silliness, then maybe a musical act (I admit, I fast forward through them too) and bam, done for the day.

This format is how she won the TiVo Wars. (Dramatic? Yes.)  Oprah doesn't have any silliness. Oh sure, there will be an occasional bit of tomfoolery (yes, I used that word), but it's the exception, not the rule.  Don't get me wrong, Oprah will always have a special place in my heart because I was in high school when she first came on the air so I kind of grew up with Oprah but I just don't see her ever having a youtube video of a girl high on painkillers from getting her wisdom teeth removed featured on her show and thinking it's the funniest thing in the world!

  Dr. Oz has many good nuggets of information but I had to mine through too much rock to get to his gold.  And I just couldn't quite get past him constantly touching all his guests.  And making them wear lab coats.  And his distracting-more-than-they're-helpful computer graphics.  Plus I couldn't really fast forward through Dr. Oz because I never knew when he was going to say something truly meaningful and clearly I am a woman who likes that fast forward button.

I'm going to adopt a few of Ellen's tactics for my social life.  Ellen sometimes looks a little uncomfortable with her guests.  That's how I feel too when I have someone new sitting on my couch - sometimes we hit it off - other times I am working really hard but they just aren't biting.  I've never actually tried doing a little stand-up act before I invite the guest to sit down but I'm definitely going to try that.  I think the music helps too.  I have stairs right off my main living area so I could easily dance up them as my guests wait backstage on the front porch to come in.  I bet my daughter would even DJ for me if I gave her enough freedom to choose from her iPod playlist.  And if I have something interesting to show my guests I am absolutely going to cover it with a cloth and put it on the sofa table behind me.  This type of reveal not only heightens the excitement but shows that I was prepped for this social engagement.  Attention to detail folks, always have attention to detail.

So good job Ellen!  Even though I emailed your show and complained when you let Brooke Shields promote the Pepsi Refresh campaign...and yes I'll admit that it's me who has been sending you Cover Girl's safety ratings on their cosmetic lines...and okay, in the interest of full disclosure I was irritated that you let Brooke Shields come on again...BUT just so you don't think I'm high maintenance or anything: I love your show.