This blog chronicles my life as I try to balance healthy lifestyle habits with my husband's penchant for pizza rolls and my daughter's desire to watch iCarly 8 hours a day. It contains a mostly humorous, kind, and somewhat spiritual look at everyday life and the people who live it.
Sunday, November 2, 2008
I'd like a re-write please
I think life is a little like that book. We're all just drifting along and WHAM you lose your job, find a lump, crash your car, your house burns down, a parent dies, you get a promotion, find out your pregnant, win the lottery, meet the man of your dreams. Life takes a lot of unexpected turns, some of them not so good. Sometimes I have felt very much like I didn't want to finish a particular chapter. I want a cosmic re-write. Surely this plot twist wasn't meant for me!?
My grandpa died when I was 18. I hadn't been close to my father for years at that point, and my grandpa stepped in and really filled that void for me. When he died, I mourned not only him, but my dad as well. My grandma was devastated. She slammed the book closed and never really opened it again. My grandma lived another 18 years after my grandpa, but she wasn't really alive after he died. She chose to end her story with his.
I am more of a re-write kind of girl myself. I have had my share of bad plot twists, but I haven't ever wanted to stop writing this story of my life. There are a few parts I'd like to re-write completely, and more than a few that could use some selective editing, but I am always excited for what will happen next. I have lived just long enough to learn that we can't ever know what will happen, but we can always put our own spin on the plot. The outline may be somewhat out of our control, but the details, ah, the details are all our own.
I rely a lot upon faith in my life. It was a complete leap of faith when I got married, against both our families' advice. It was a complete leap of faith to quit my job and be a stay-at-home-mom. It was a complete leap of faith to move to Cincinnati, then to Toledo, then to Massachusetts. But isn't every day a complete leap of faith? We don't know what will happen, though we carefully schedule each day. We don't know what the future brings, though we worry endlessly with a false sense of control. We don't know how this story ends.
All I know is that my life is a page-turner, and I can't wait to read the next chapter.