I was kidnapped by a tribe of mini-sloths

My family would probably take issue with being called mini-sloths. And, okay, I wasn't actually kidnapped, I believed at the time that I was choosing this life while being of sound mind and body. Right now I am trying to think while being asked constant questions, being told amazing facts, and being given a constant stream of drink orders. But wait, isn't today supposed to be a SCHOOL day?? My dearest daughter was sent home from school today, her prognosis grim: headache, sore throat, stuffy nose, and body aches. Luckily by the time we reached home a miracle had occurred! Suddenly the headache had disappeared. Her throat couldn't have been too sore since she chattered the entire way home, and if her body ached, it didn't ache enough to prevent her from doing "robot" dance moves as she took off her coat and kicked off her shoes.

I am a creature of habit. I like my schedule and I feel comfortable knowing that on Mondays I wash clothes and pay bills. Tuesdays I volunteer at school and grocery shop. Wednesdays I do an extra long workout and run errands. Thursdays I volunteer at school and wash all the bedding. Fridays I do an extra long workout and clean the house. Sounds peaceful doesn't it? That's why sick days, snow days, federal holidays and winter and spring break send me into a complete breakdown. Those long hours without routine, form, or plans make me sweat. I think back longingly to my days as a computer programmer. I knew what to do all day long. I was rarely overwhelmed, disappointed, or bored. I had purpose. I couldn't recite most of the dialogue from Beauty and the Beast.

But then my daughter gets sick at school and I remember all the reasons I continue to stay at home. I stay home not to honor a routine, cook meals, clean a house, or be available for errands. My routine is merely the pause to fill the hours until my real job comes home from school. I like to think I am my own boss, and sometimes I probably am. I'm a Mom and whatever form that takes each day is the job description for the day.

Life in captivity isn't so bad, and besides, I like my mini-sloths.