This blog chronicles my life as I try to balance healthy lifestyle habits with my husband's penchant for pizza rolls and my daughter's desire to watch iCarly 8 hours a day. It contains a mostly humorous, kind, and somewhat spiritual look at everyday life and the people who live it.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Grace #6 Steve

Originally I was going to make this grace about Girl Scout cookies, but as y'all know I am no longer sacrificing to the refined-white-sugar-gods-though-tasty-they-may-be and so I decided to mention someone even sweeter than cookies, and that would be my main man Steve.

Steve can be the tiniest bit bossy (!) and he kind of demanded that he be mentioned (finally) but I suppose it really is time. Steve is a big part of the reason I am successful as a human being. When I was moping around the house bemoaning my lack of friends, he was the one who harrangued me into joining a new gym by trying to make friends for me at his gym (ewww!). When I was disgusted with my recent weight gain he was the one who agreed that I did look pretty bad (thus destroying my illusion that no one had really noticed) and encouraged me to return to exercising, even offering to work out with me. When I worry about the finances, he's the one who suggests I spend less. When I get frustrated about the old house we rent, he reminds me that we could be stuck in an apartment trying to dodge the perverts whenever we go to check our mail. If our interactions and his encouragement all sound a little rough, well, they are. And somehow, that's exactly what I need. I don't know if I spent a past life in a prison camp or what, but I just seem to respond better to the plain-talking-no-frills-Beth-get-your-head-out-of-your-ass type of advice than a I do to a lot of gentle platitudes.

It is amazing to me how much good advice Steve has given to me over the years. He has seen me through friendship breakups and facial breakouts, weight gain and financial loss, misery and ecstasy and managed to maintain the same even keel of wry humor and practicality. I never would have had the courage to face marriage, motherhood, unemployment, and illness had it not been for Steve.

He is the wind beneath my wings.

I don't care how corny it sounds, everyone needs someone who lifts them up, brushes them off, and sets them back on the path of life every once in awhile and I know I'm lucky to be married to that someone. Steve is never my go-to-guy when I want to chat, or vent, or discuss, or examine. He doesn't really want to talk to me much. He doesn't necessarily listen to me all that much either.

But he loves me.

Unconditionally.

And that, my friends, is a Grace.

3 comments:

Deb said...

Well-it's about time! :) What sweet words to share about your man Steve...God always gives us just what we need. Lucky you.

Teresa said...

Hi Beth, I'm Teresa. I stumbled upon your blog via Brent's. Curiosity grabbed me when I saw that you moved from OH to NE. I lived in NE and moved to OH. Love to hear about others' perspectives.
You're a talented writer! Have a great day!

Brent said...

For the record,....my guess is (simply from the male perspective here)...it isn't that Steve doesn't want to be your "go-to-guy when you want to chat, or vent, or discuss, or examine. Not that He doesn't really want to talk to you much. Not that He doesn't necessarily listen to you all that much either.....my guess is, he simply isn't sure how to accomplish that. Most men are simply not wired that way and it is a learned/taught behavior. He probably thinks you don't want him to be those things or doesn't feel that you want him to fill that need.....Sometimes a good heart to heart with the understanding that the man needs taught in this regard can change that aspect (but it will take baby-steps)....He loves you unconditionally which means, he likely desires to be all he can for you but you need to help him get there....believe me, I have learned this the hard way! We desire to be our wives best girl friend, we just don't know how. :-)